What's going on?

One dream isn't a big deal.  Three night ago, I had a sex dream.  It wasn't super triggering, nor did I feel like it stayed with me very long, if at all.  I couldn't even tell you what it was about.

Two dream makes me slightly concerned.  The next night I had another dream.  Again, didn't feel super triggering, nor did it stick me with.  I know it had something to do with a TV show I had been watching, MI-5, one of the characters, the super ruggedly handsome spy, was in the dream.

Three dreams starts to become bothersome.  Another dream the next night was just annoying. I didn't actually have sex in this dream, like the two previous, but there was enough sexual content to be triggering. 

So after three nights of dreams, I start to wonder what's going on with me that my sub-conscious feels the need to process like this.  I also realized yesterday that I had 10 voice mail messages from Friday/Saturday that I hadn't listened to or returned yet.  That is always the beginning of isolating for me.  I'll quit answering my phone and then won't listen or return messages either.  I did answer them all yesterday and have made a commitment to answer the phone for the next 72 hours if I'm available.

How do I feel exactly: 
Overwhelmed:  I have so much to do and although I feel like I'm making progress, I'm not keeping up.  There is so much to get done between school, work, piano, cleaning, therapy, church, family, friends, I don't feel like I'm keeping up with everything. 

Lonely:  In some ways I feel more connected than I have in years. I have friends who know who I am and who I feel emotionally present with on a consistent basis. I'm really enjoying my family right now. Boundaries have been put in place and I'm holding them and all of the sudden these people are SO FUN.  Yet at the same time, something is missing.  My therapist asked me last week when I was going to start dating again.  I know that's what I want to do, but it scares me to death!  And I don't even know where I would meet someone.  The Internet thing is my drug -- I wouldn't even consider finding someone online.  I've been going to single adult events for year with no success.

Scared:  I made the decision to not look for full-time work.  I've picked up many piano students and also a variety of short-term consulting jobs.  I'm really enjoying the freedom it provides me.  As long as I'm a little careful, I can make ends meet without a problem.  I'm just slightly scared about it.  What if things don't go as well as planned?  The what if scenarios are freaking me out a little bit.

Restless: I need something new. I need a change. I keep dreaming up big things to change.  It makes me a little worried as I know escaping is something I struggle with.  I need something new.  Last night I was thinking I'd drastically change my hair.  Two days ago I thought I might pick up and move to another state.  Tonight, I just want a long road trip.  I don't know..... I just feel restless.

That is all I can think of.... but know there is more going on... hopefully getting rid of the first layer will help me dig deeper tomorrow.