Disclosure

My brother sent me an email today.

"Why did you start seeing a counselor?"

That was the entire contents of the email.  I was taken back at first.  This brother is the truth seeker.  He needs to know and understand the reasoning and truth behind everything he does.  He's also the brother that has a porn addiction, or so my mother says.  He did when we were younger.  I remember when he got in trouble for having cut out pictures of lingerie from the JC Penny catalog under his mattress. 

Although my therapist has encouraged a family disclosure in the past, he finally gave it up about 6 months ago concluding that in my severely enmeshed family, it's not secrecy that we need to overcome, rather boundaries we need to develop. 

But, could I pass this opportunity up?

I dug a little deeper -- why are you asking? curiosity? rumor confirmation?

"I think I want to see a counselor."  was his response.  Ok - I think I should be honest then. 

I didn't use the word sex - but I did say - I have an addiction and needed some help to get a handle on it.  I also said, I had so much anger and resentment towards dad that I knew I needed help getting over it.  I didn't want him to die with me feeling that way.  I also told him that Steve was married the whole 7 years I dated him and that I felt I was lacking basic emotional skills and couldn't handle situations without getting angry or frustrated. 

He was very short after that. One word answers. But several minutes later came back and wrote: Thank you. 

Not sure what can of worms or Pandora's box I just opened. For a few moments I was a little manic about it.  But right now, I feel congruent.