6.1

So I went all week last week with a feelings post every day.  3 weeks left.

Fear: I had book club at my house tonight. And even though I knew multiple people were coming, there is still this fear that no one will show up. Or that they will show up and not have a good time. Like it's all my fault if they don't have a good time... co-dependency moment. Though, I will say I was proud of myself for not fretting about it all day. It was probably only an hour of the day that I worried about it.  Everyone came and it was a good time.

Anger: I'm mad at my mom. I'm hoping the anger stage will pass soon.

Pain: I walked today, I'm tired of not walking.  I only did 15 minutes before the hip starting hurting, so I switched to the bike. 

Shame: A little bit -- but I'm not exactly sure what about.

Guilt: Not really.

Loneliness: A little bit -- as I processed some of what went on for me as a child and the abandonment and fear of rejection going on in my life, I was lonely. Though I wasn't triggered, I got out my fire kit and read all the letters and comforting things in there to remind me of the people in my life who are real who love me.  It really helped.

Love: I prayed a lot today and really felt loved by my Heavenly Father.

Joy: Not really.

Passion: Nope.